By Aislinn De'Ath

By Aislinn De'Ath
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Sunday 8 January 2012

I'm the one sitting facing the wall with my arms crossed...

Reader, I am sulking. Why am I sulking? Because I don't want to go to work tomorrow, that's why. No, it's not the first day back since the Christmas holls. That was last Thursday. No, I'm not going back to something hellishly difficult. I'm actually going to be working on a rather nice account, which is selling organic, free range, happy fruit and veg to jolly nice middle class people. And my work colleagues for this account are a rather nice jokey lot, who are rather lovely to chat to.

But the thought of being on the phones for 8.5 hours and staring at a computer screen all day (yes I realise that's what I'm doing now) is rather dreadful. The thing with being an actor is, in order to do the thing you love most, you usually have to spend 85% of your working life doing something that is not what you want to do. Unless you have wealthy, very generous parents. Some may say that actually, that's a bit of a fib, because you could be a teacher or work in a theatre related business or something, but essentially, you need to be able to drop your jobbing job like a hot chicken nugget if an acting job or even just an audition comes along. And if you work in a proper job, you'd be letting people down if you did that. I even get massive guilt over cancelling babysitting if I get an acting job! The handy thing about the company I work for is that it was essentially designed for actors. So they tend to actually be happy for you if you call in and cancel at short notice because you have an audition or a job. Which is wonderful. Although, they don't pay holiday wages, so if you DO have to take a day off, you'll really miss the pay.

The downside is that working in a call centre is tedious, repetitive work. It;s a great company, I like what I'm selling, I think my workmates are brilliant in a number of magical ways, but my god, the work itself makes me want to bash my brains out with my headset. Because on the whole, every conversation you have is the same. Yes, occasionally you get really great ones, where the person on the other end of the phone is hysterically funny and also makes a stonking big order from you then thanks you for calling them, but the rest of the time it's 'oh hi is mrs. wassername there? Oh ok, I'll try later' or 'You're not interested? Oh, ok then, no worries'. Working on a new account alleviates the dullness a little (as does finding out that there's someone vaguely famous working on the floor) but this is why actors have to do the job. Because we have something else to give our lives a bit of excitement and can go 'ah well, at least this isn't the career!' If we're still in a call centre at 50 plus, we may not be quite so cheery.

For the moment, I just need to get through the next three weeks or so. Because after that, I have a month off from the call centre, rehearsing for the theatre tour. Which will be incredible. But also scary, because it will be my first tour, the longest I'll have ever have done a play.

In other news, since Christmas 3 of my friends have got engaged. Is this year some kind of special astrology based boom year or something? It's all very nice and very romantic, but I think The Lad thinks I'm dropping hints, because every time I turn on my computer I go 'Oh, so and so's engaged' and then talking about their weddings for ages. He's been walking round with a slight scared expression ever since. To offset his fear, whenever anyone goes 'It'll be you next' I get very childish and go 'AS IF! BOYS?! BOYS ARE SMELLY!' So he doesn't think that I'm some crazy bridezilla who's despo to drag him up the aisle. Instead he now thinks I am a crazy man hater who never wants to marry. I am in fact, neither of those extremes. I am a normal person who's got lots of friends who are getting married. Oh god, I just realised how many wedding outfits I have to get this year.Wedding outfits are hellish. Because there are so many rules. You can't wear white, because that's tacky and rude at someone else's wedding and implies you wish you were the bride. You can't wear off the shoulder, above the knee or busty outfits, because people will assume you're fishing for your own hubby. You can't look too good or people will think you're trying to upstage the bride. You can't wear too much black or people will think you're terribly sad about the wedding. You can't wear massive heels or people will think it's a footballer's wedding. This list cancels out most of my wardrobe. I may just go in my yellow flowery duvet, with arm holes ripped in it. Sorted!

Right Reader, off to learn some lines
Ash
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